Bitter

Friday went better than I thought. I did not break down and crumble. I was able to hold it together.

I was disappointed in the fact that “she” took things that “she” shouldn’t have. Although can I say I was surprised? No. In fact I would have been surprised to find the things she took. She took my parents wedding ring. Sure my Mom and Dad were no longer married…but she took the wedding band that my Dad had when he was married to my Mother. I don’t think she had any right to that. Although she has done a lot of things I don’t think she has any right to. She has to live with herself so….

Also she took all of my Dads medical books. I ask…can anyone tell me why she would want those? What reason would she have for taking those? She is not blood related so she has no concern of the possibility she will suffer from pulmonary fibrosis. The fact that it may be hereditary (my grandmother suffered and died from it as well) so why…why would she take something that could be vitally important to my brother and I or anyone else in the family that god forbid could possibly have pulmonary fibrosis?

Wow I really really despise her. She is so cruel and anyone’s worse nightmare. I had been so naive and trusting and sure that her actions were a big misunderstanding. She wasn’t thinking clearly, she was in shock, grief but of course not intent on trying to hurt us or leave us out or take from us. No never that. Couldn’t be that. People really are not that way.
Wow did I ever get a huge dose of reality!

I don’t know if I really learned anything though. I think I will still trust people, always look for the best in people and never imagine the worse.

I don’t know if this is a good trait to have or just makes me a fool. Do I need to open my eyes and see people for what they are? Greedy, selfish only look out for themselves animals? Or does that make me cold and bitter?

In all honesty I know I talk a good game…but I will never change. I will trust anyone. I am sure I will help the next person stab me in the back by sharpening the knife.